What is the point of life?
I know it's not to get smaller
What would you do if could take a pill that made you skinner, as thin as you want to be, but you would die from it within the next year or two?
What about if a pill could make you have a longer, happier, and more profound life, but you would get bigger?
Which would you choose?
For me, this question seems absurd. Of course you want the one that will make you happier! And maybe that’s the obvious answer when it’s theoretical. But in reality? I don’t know that it is that obvious.
A friend’s sister died of stomach cancer at the age of 39. It was terrible, and I couldn’t believe it. But recently, my friend told me that as her sister was dying of cancer and unable to keep food down, people were…complimenting her.
Another friend of mine used to be anorexic, before I knew her. While she dropped weight at an alarming pace and was slowly dying on the inside people…complimented her.
We choose to be sick and unhealthy, even close to death, again and again in order to be thin. And even when we’re not actively choosing it, we’re cheering people on who are.
Not that either of these was a choice. What I mean is that, as a society, we feel that the end result, getting thin, is worth it. Of course if you knew that person was dying or anorexic, you would eat your words. But maybe, just maybe, you should be careful with telling everyone who you see slimming down that they’re doing great and throwing judgement, even if silently, at anyone gaining weight?
I remember, when I was little, hearing that those with Type 1 diabetes are always hungry but unable to gain weight because their bodies don’t process food correctly. I was jealous. I was literally jealous. That sounded like paradise to me. Eat all you want and remain thin? Win-win! And I know I’m not alone.
I was little. Little. As in diet culture had already made such an impression on me that I would have done anything to be thin. To me, thin equaled popular and popularity meant happiness. Even kids can’t celebrate body diversity past a certain age.
What if that friend’s sister had been in recovery (and I’m so sad she never will be, it’s beyond tragic). She would have put on weight. Do you think she would have received as many compliments as when she was losing weight, aka, dying?
What about anorexia recovery. As a person re-feeds themselves and all of their bodily functions return back to normal, they gain weight and what does society say to them? Probably not much. Sure, people knowing that person is in recovery might. And yes, if that person was beyond a certain threshold we would say that they are looking “so healthy”. But really, gaining weight is not usually celebrated.
But losing weight is. Losing weight at any cost is.
While these are extreme examples, what about someone who is dieting? A chronic dieter, a professional dieter, a life-long dieter. Call them what you will but I bet you know multiple people like that. I know I was one.
You’re constantly thinking about food. Never fully satisfied. Never able to let go. Always planning your meals, what you can eat when, what you can eat if you go out, what you’ll eat on vacation. Then you lose weight, you feel on top of the world. You weigh yourself a day later and have gained two pounds! Noooo! Your day is ruined, you have to get some extra exercise and cut out that apple you’ve been allowing yourself. But you’re so hungry. Why are you always so hungry?
People. This is considered normal! That is what a diet is. This is the mind of a dieter! You’re life turns into the constant pursuit of weight loss. Your mind is never far from food. You become obsessed with cook books, recipes, new diets, new weight loss tips and tricks. That is what your life is reduced to.
So, what pill does our society always choose? I know it’s not the one that makes your life longer, happier, and more profound.
Maybe it’s time we reevaluate our values as a society?
Let me know what you think in the comments below!
Until we meet again,
Asya
Spot on, Asya!